Looking Through Rose Colored Glasses

dog wearing glasses

I know most people think that they need to look at what is and react to it whether it is something wanted or something unwanted. But the truth is that we all have a choice to react in any manner we desire. We honestly do create our own reality. And there are always two sides of everything, meaning that you can look at any situation as the cup is half empty or as the cup is half full. It is all a sense of perception. The empty signifies the negative side and the full signifies the positive side. So when you are looking at the full side you are focusing on the positive side and that is easy because you feel joy, but what do you do when you witness something unwanted? My suggestion is that you look away and find something, anything, more joyful to focus on. The more you practice this, the more you will attract more positive things, people and situations to come into your experience. This is what I like to think of as looking through rose colored glasses. I like to think about what I do want and not give much attention to unwanted things except to notice that they are unwanted. I then immediately shift my thinking to more pleasant thoughts even if it is something non-related to what I don’t want. Eventually when I have myself in a good frame of mind I can think of the wanted in a more prosperous way.

For a while now that is exactly what I have been doing and to tell you the truth I have never been happier. I can see now why people experience whatever it is they are focused on. After 9/11 I found myself watching the news intently and I was becoming more and more scared to live in my own country. I was sinking into a deep depression and I knew I had to do something drastic before I became totally paralyzed by my fear.

The first thing I did was to stop watching the news. I couldn’t take it anymore. They just kept talking about it in an endless loop and it got to be mind boggling. So as the days went on I found that by focusing on more pleasant things, like my children, I could feel joy enter my life once again. I truly believe that by this one act of looking away from unwanted truths I started finding my authentic self. And once I started down this path things started changing rapidly for me. And because I was being more selfish and caring more about how I was feeling about everything, things got a little hectic for a minute. I ended up leaving my husband just as the recession got started. Money got very tight and I could hardly pay rent. But I’ll tell you I was much happier than I had been in a long time. And I had faith that things would get better because life goes in cycles and this was just a dip in this time interval.

A short while later my husband passed on to the next phase of life and I became a widow. This made it so that I could collect his social security and his pension. This helped for quite a while but the recession was still on going and I guess I was still buying into the idea that we should all be suffering. It took me a while but as I was sinking into the abyss I remembered that this was not who I am. I am not a (woe is me) kind of person. That’s when I started looking for any way I could to raise my spirits. Instantly things started improving. Money started flowing more freely, my home situation improved, and my whole demeanor transformed for the better. I started reading everything I could find that would help me understand that I am truly the creator of my own reality, and I have the choice to see things, the way I want to, through rose colored glasses.

It has been a few years now and I am still on my beautiful path. So many wonderful things have happened and I know there is so much more to come. I have learned to see things in a much more loving way and I feel good 99.9% of the time. Keeping one’s self happy is a full time job and I for one am willing to make that sacrifice. I know what it feels like to be depressed and don’t wish that feeling on anybody. It is very true that it all starts on the inside. And once you get the hang of happiness you can’t go back. It just feels wrong.

My son is in his twenties now and he has a very good job, government related, and he wants so much for me to hate the government the way he does. But what he doesn’t understand is that by focusing on what he hates he is just perpetuating the unwanted and making himself miserable in the meantime. He asked me, “Why won’t you hate the government with me mom?” I told him it is because I want to be happy. I feel that it is easy for people to look at situations they don’t agree with and try to push them away, but all that does is make it bigger and more uncomfortable for the one pushing. We can’t control what other’s do but we can control how we react to it. What I mean is in order to feel better about a situation you need to look at the positive side of it, or the bright side so to speak. You know there are plenty of things the government does with our tax money that is really good. They build parks and highways for us to travel on. They also provide medi-cal for people that need medical attention and can’t afford it. And don’t forget food stamps for families in need of assistance. There are many more things like that for us to focus on, so you get the picture. I’m sure there are things that you could think of that you appreciate about the government.

In order to see things through rose colored glasses you must see things from the bright side. Sooth your anger, fear and hate by focusing on something pleasing to you and then look for positive aspects of what you are wanting, then watch and see how much happier you are and how your world is morphing right before your very eyes, just the way you want it to.

One thing we must always remember is that we can only control our own emotions. We cannot think, act or feel for another. Nor can any other think, act or do for us. We must all find our own way to happiness, and we must find a way of staying there as often as possible. Then and only then will we truly be the beings we are meant to be. Whoa! Did that hit you like it just hit me? I hope so because I really felt a jolt. So in essence what I got from this is that by staying happy I have the power to do, be or have anything I want to. And no one or anything can project any negativity on me that I do not desire. Keeping myself focused on what I do want, and staying happy on my journey to whatever that is, is all my work really is. I’m going to milk this feeling for a while. It is the most clear I have been in a long time. Not that I haven’t been picking up nuggets of clarity all along the way. But once in a while you get a glimpse of something that just sums up all the answers to questions that have been looming in the background, and BAM!, YOU KNOW! You just know. Right now, what I know is, that life is good and I’m doing great, and wellbeing is abundant, and it just keeps getting better as I focus and stay happy, no matter what anyone else is doing. I choose me! And I hope for all your sakes you choose YOU! Live the life you want no matter what anyone else thinks. They can’t think for you, only you know what is right for you. And that can’t be wrong. And when you live this way things will always work out for you. Remember there is great love here for you.

 

Your loving friend,

Deb Mertan

You also can find your path to joy by purchasing  my guide book,
” Choose a Powerfully Positive Life” 

Re-train Your Brain

debs blog pics retrian your brain

 

 

So, if you have been following my blogs you know about the law of attraction. So you also know that you get what you think about whether it’s good or bad. What you focus on, even if it’s for a short period of time, will become your experience. The law is always fair and consistent. It’s like when you’re dating a certain type of person and for some reason it doesn’t work out, so you move on to the next person only to find the same person in a different body. And until you decide it’s time to clean up your vibration, meaning your point of expectation, you will continue to attract that same person over and over again. When you realize this it is time to re-train your brain. It’s not as hard as you might think. It just takes a little practice and some patience.

So let’s say that you just broke up with your lover and you are feeling lost and alone. But that is because you are using that person as your source of happiness, and that’s why you feel out of sorts and a little un-balanced. Now let’s look at it another way. That person wasn’t the right one for you. They were just another piece of the puzzle, letting you know what you don’t want, therefore helping you figure out what you do want. And when you do look at the situation in this way you can actually feel the happiness grow inside you a little bit each day, until you realize that the happiness you were seeking was right there all along. This is you loving yourself more fully. And the more you do that the better you’ll feel. When you are selfish enough to care about how you feel and you practice that often you will never go back to feeling down, at least not without knowing what to do about it. That’s when it’s time to look for a new mate. But no matter what,if you date one person or a thousand people you are exploring and figuring out what is best for you. Isn’t that nice to know. And each time you part ways with a potential mate you will understand that it is just part of the process and there is nothing wrong. In fact, it couldn’t be more right. Keeping yourself on an emotional high is the only way to live. This could seem a little tricky at first but once you get the hang of it you can create anything you want in your life. I like to think of it as my own little world. Each person is in their own little world. None of us thinks exactly alike. We all have our own ideas and our own feelings about what is right and what is wrong for ourselves. No one else can insert their feelings into another person. Oh, they can influence another to manipulate them to do something, but eventually that will upset the relationship, and it will dissolve or fall apart. If you remember to live and let live and stop judging and condemning, and stop making anyone responsible for your happiness, life will be so much fun. It is so important to know this, because life can be whatever you want it to be as long as you take responsibility for your own joy. And let other people be responsible for theirs. The universe is very tricky in that it can help every one of us have what we want without taking anything away from anyone else. It has a way of blending us all together in perfect harmony when we are in a happy state of mind.

I know that if you are new to this concept that it could be a little un-settling to think of being your own boss. But I promise you it will be very rewarding once you get into the rhythm of happiness, and you let it run to you and through you. It’s like a stream that flows swiftly and you put your boat in the water and relax, the flow will carry you along with ease and you won’t even need paddles. But if you were to turn the boat up-stream and start paddling it would be a very difficult struggle. You can tell which way you are going by the way you feel. If you feel good about what you are thinking, doing, or who you’re with, then; you are definitely going with the flow. So, keep that in mind next time something upsets you. Pay attention to all your feelings and gravitate toward the good ones and steer clear of the not so good ones. Just learn from them and move forward. That is how you re-train your brain.

Here’s another example; Let’s say you are working a job that you hate. Yes, it pays the bills but it is not very rewarding. Every day you wake up with a grouchy attitude because you know you’re going to have another crappy day. Things will never get better for you when you wake up expecting to have a bad day. So how do you change that? You start by focusing on something you can feel good about, even if it is not related to work, it will help to focus on that. You could try by telling yourself before you slumber at night that you will release all resistance about work, and when you wake up in the morning try thinking about how you want the day to go. You may only make it to breakfast before you think of something un-wanted, but that’s okay, it takes practice. Just laugh it off and try again the next day. It will get better. As you keep doing this you will notice a change in the way you feel at work. And when you do feel better at work you might find that there are aspects of your job that you actually like, or you may find an opportunity to get a new job that you really love. But you must find your inner happiness first or you will just keep finding the same situation, just different faces and different places. It’s like the guy that keeps doing the same thing over and over again, expecting different results. Or think of it like this, Or you could say that if you don’t change the vibration of your thought patterns you will just be taking yourself with you, and you’ll end up in a loop of anguish.

You know it doesn’t have to take too long to change to a different mindset. It’s all up to you. The more you practice the faster it will change, and eventually it will become the norm for you to look for and find things that bring you joy.

And here’s the last thing I’d like to mention. Whenever you want to start a project and you don’t know how it’s going to come or who will bring it or where the money will come from, don’t worry. Worry is not necessary. It only slows things down. Let the ideas come to you and relax your mind through meditation, or petting your cat, or taking a walk in nature. And when the inspiration hits you to make the next move, then; take action. The money will find its way to you. Keep thinking about why you want what you want, how it will make you feel and what about it will be fun. I promise you that when you approach anything in this manner all the components will be attracted to you. Just pay attention to how you feel and if you start to get a little overwhelmed take some deep breaths and remember to remember to go within, find a happy thought and bring yourself back to center. Think of it like this, the universe knows what you want and knows how to bring it to you. That’s how the universe works. It may take you down some windy roads but when you look back you’ll see that everything that happened was necessary to bring you to where you are now. Remember that you are the boss of you and you truly deserve all the happiness in the world. You don’t need to wait until you’re old to start traveling and getting all the goodies you have ever wanted. You just need to re-train your brain to know and believe that you can be, do or have anything you want. Think big and know that you are a very worthy being. Whether it’s a lover, a job, or an invention, or anything else you desire, you can have it. All you have to do is figure out what you want and then let yourself have it. You know it’s as easy to create a button as it to create a castle. Life is good when you let it be, or should I say if you expect it to be. Remember to be your own boss and feel your way to bliss.

So are you feeling good yet? I think you are, or at the very least you’re feeling better. Be kind to yourself and everyone else too. And remember there is great love here for you.

Your friend forever,

Deb Mertan

You too, can experience a  positive life flow with my guidebook, “How to Choose a Powerfully Positive Life”

PMS, Not What You Think…

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I know when people hear the acronym PMS they think of premenstrual-syndrome, and you can see why. PMS has been the curse of a lot of women, therefore their husbands and children, have suffered through it too. But that is not what this blog is all about. Yes the acronym is the same but I am giving it a whole new meaning. I am calling it pre-manifestational-syndrome. Let me explain. You know, if you have been reading my blogs, that I am a true believer of self-manifestation. And there is nothing we all can’t be, do, or have as long as we focus on what we do want, and not on what we don’t want. I’ll use the analogy of the corn seed planted in the ground. You logically know that once the seed is planted that there is a process that could take weeks or even months that needs to occur before you’ll see the full manifestation of the ears of corn on the stalk. If you were to get impatient and dig up the seed before it has a chance to grow you will kill the whole plan, dream or process. But if you wait patiently and watch for the signs of the corn coming, like the first sprigs of leaves poking through the ground, and then the little yellow balls that form just before they start forming into ears, and then voila, you can actually pick and eat them.

But wait, now you have no more corn. Oh dear, what to do now? Well if you really think about it we experience this similar scenario all the time. You see once you get what it is you are wanting it becomes old news. And yes it pleases you for a moment but then you find something else to go after. And if you are in this PMS (pre-manifestational-syndrome) state of mind eventually that will manifest as well. And once that shows up we are off to the next thing we want. It’s when we try to force things to come that we kill the whole process. I guess kill is too strong a word, it’s more like stifle. So the trick is to relax and let the universe do its thing, because it knows what you want and knows how to bring it to you. It is so fun to watch as all the components come together to bring you whatever you desire no matter what that may be. It will become a manifestation that not only you can see but others can as well. It’s almost magic. And it is oh so fun when you watch for the signs and know that you are in sync with your desire, and then see it appear right before your very eyes. But it’s not magic, it is the way it is supposed to be. And the only reason anybody wants anything is because they think it will make them happy. And since happiness is the goal, why not just be happy? Appreciate what you have and where you are in life and watch as it just keeps getting better and better. Once you get the idea to stop taking score of where you are and what you have or don’t have, and realize that keeping yourself happy is the path to everything else you want, life will just seem so easy and fun.

Now let’s talk about how to do this. As we all know there are plenty of things out there that can lead us down an ugly path. So how do you stay happy? By looking at something else that is more pleasing. When you focus on more pleasing things you will actually make it easier to find solutions to problems, rather than focusing on the problem, therefore perpetuating the difficulty. Nothing good ever comes from dwelling on the negative side of anything. As you can see there are two sides to everything. There is no dark without light, no good without bad, and no happy without knowing what sad really is. But once you experience the not wanted it is up to you to look away, bring yourself to a happy state of mind, then and only then, address the situation from a place of love and therefore bring a solution.

I know I’ve mentioned this in other blogs, but it bears re-iterating. What would unconditional love do? When we do everything from a place of love and appreciation life just flows more smoothly and we feel good most of the time. And when we have those rare moments of not so happy times we now know what to do about them, and we can bring ourselves back to a better frame of mind more swiftly.

So next time you hear the acronym PMS think about what you have been wanting and if you have been on the positive side or the negative side of it. You will know by the way you feel when you are thinking about it. And watch for the signs that are revealed to you all day every day that will lead you to wherever it is you want to be. Trust that the universe is always communicating with you and is always on your side no matter what. But remember you will get what you think about whether it is bad or good. So go within and find that happy thought, let it gestate, and then move forward. Life is so good when you allow it to be. You are the boss of you so never forget that. Leave everyone else out of the equation when you are finding your bliss, and miraculously you will attract like-minded people into your realm, and life gets even better. Seriously when life seems like it’s at its best it can get better, really! Believe me, I have been experiencing this for a while now, and just when I think life couldn’t get any better, IT DOES! There is no limit in this infinite universe. You are the only block of ANYTHING you want. You have all the magic inside you right now, if you only believe it and then know it. It’s all up to you. Now no more excuses about why your life is not what you want it to be. Get happy and watch all the people and things that you desire fall into place just the way you want them to. This is not airy-fairy chit-chat. This is for real. I know because I am living proof. I am so happy right now and I know there is so much more to come. You can say I am excited about NOW and EAGER for more. But Now is where it’s at and when the more comes it will be the “Now of then”. It’s all happening now, and now and now, get it. Love who you are and where you’re at and watch it grow like the corn stalk that brings you that ear of corn. It’s so fun and liberating to stay happy and let others find their joy without judgement or condemnation. Live and let live is my motto.

So now you know what to do and what to watch for. Be kind to yourself. Don’t get mad when you have an off day. Press the reset button before you sleep and wake up in a new frame of mind. Practice being your authentic self then life will be so amazing.

See my guide book to “Choose a Powerfully Positive Life”

Remember there is great love here for you.

Your friend,

Deb Mertan

That Sneaky Doubt

Whiplash

 

I know that it is easier said than done when someone is constantly telling you to think positive. What about all the negative things that go on every day in our lives? We grow up watching our parents worry over money or some other out of control situation, but really it’s normal for things to be this way. This is where positive thinking comes in. It is our reactions to these situations that makes the difference. Think about it, what good does it do to worry or stress out about anything. In fact you are actually doing more harm than good when you react in this manner. Maybe some parents handled things with an attitude of fear and hopelessness which in turn would rub off on the children. But the ones that handled it with, “Oh, this is just another challenge to deal with”, attitude, taught the children that any situation can have a silver lining. Unfortunately more parents were doom and gloom type folks so it is hard for a lot of people to see the forest for the trees.

I happened to come from a doom and gloom family. My father was a big time gambler and my mother was struck with a debilitating disease and died when I was in my early twenties. There are 5 siblings so the fighting was never ending and I couldn’t wait to move out on my own to finally get some peace and quiet. When I finally did move out it gave me the calmness I needed to work on myself and find my true path in this life. I read books, learned to meditate and even joined a gym to get myself balanced in all directions. Things seemed to be going well for me in all aspects of life except in the love arena. It seemed that I was always finding guys that didn’t want to fully commit to me. I felt it was because I was ahead of my time and I just needed to find someone that could understand me. I actually did get married in my early thirties, but only because I wanted children and I happened to find someone that wanted children too. I had been running my own business for about ten years at that time, and was quite successful at it so I knew that even if it didn’t work out with this guy I could take care of myself and a child, so I went for it. We married and settled into a dull routine, and I stayed for twenty years. But one day I woke up and said, “I can’t do this anymore”. By now I was in my early fifties and I didn’t want to waste any more of what was left of my youth. I still felt young and energetic and I wanted to explore life to the fullest, so I left my husband. This was at a time when the recession hit hard and I was barely making any money. I ended up in a one bathroom, three bedroom house with eight other people besides me. This was a challenge but somehow we made it work. I had two teenage children now and things got so tight that I was feeling very low and out of sorts. We were there for a year and a half before I got a call that my husband had died. It was quite a shock, but it was also a blessing in disguise. Because we were still married I got his pension and Social Security. This gave me enough money for my two kids and me to move out on our own. We were all very happy about that because it was a chance for a fresh start. We found a four bedroom house which gave me an extra room to rent out to a boarder, which in turn gave me a little more money to keep my house hold going for quite some time.

The recession was still in effect but we were doing alright for a while. Then part of the Social Security ran out and they were only giving me money for my son. I was still struggling with my business and I felt my faith fading. Not only that but my tenant moved out suddenly and that left another hole in my income. Needless to say my doom and gloom was taking over and I felt hopeless. Then when my son turned eighteen and they stopped his Social Security, and that was the straw that broke the camel’s back.  I was sinking into a deep depression and I didn’t know what I was going to do.

That wasn’t the worst part, now I was being evicted from the house after two years and I didn’t know if anyone else would rent to me with that on my record. I decided to do something drastic. If I was going to turn this mess around I had to feel myself with hope and faith. I began by looking up ways to lift my spirits no matter what was going on around me. I read mantras, quotes and stories of people that had been down and lifted their selves back up. I learned little tricks, like making a list of ten things I loved about myself and reading it every day before I left the house. I would smile at myself in the mirror and say, “I love you” to my reflection. Almost instantly I found myself in a better frame of mind, it took a couple of days to really get the ball rolling, but it was rolling. At first I started noticing little things changing. Like people being extra nice to me and most of them were strangers. Then my landlord called and said he knew I was having trouble with money so he wanted to give me a month’s free rent. I was astounded. Unfortunately I was so far behind in everything that the free rent was just a minor fix, but it was the beginning of my new understanding of positive thinking. As long as I kept this up things could only get better. I made it a rule in my home that there would be no more doom and gloom and we were to all help support each other whenever one of us felt that way.

Well I fell behind in the rent again and the landlord was forced to try the eviction once again. But this time I wasn’t scared and I calmly sat down to think about my options. My daughter was old enough now that she could get us a place to live in her name if it came down to it, and that’s when the miracles really started to happen. All of a sudden my phone rang and it was a friend of mine that owned a rental property. She said that her tenants just gave notice that they were moving and she wanted to know if I wanted to rent her place. Well of course I said yes. By the time my court date came I was ready with a plan of action to get everything in order to go the way I wanted it to, and it did. I did not waver in my quest to get things on the right track and lo and behold everything went according to plan.

Well it has been a couple of years now since all that went down and I have to say that life just keeps getting better and better. Oh sure I have to keep reminding myself to think positive, especially when something goes awry and I start feeling that sneaky doubt try to works its way into my mind, and it will try. That is where remembering to remember that I am in control of me, not the world around me, I am in my own world, just like everyone else is in their own world. I choose to be happy and to believe that anything is possible. I have seen it with my own two eyes and I will never waver ever again no matter how events unfold in my life. In fact I have given my past life new meaning so that I can see the positive that came out of it, like if this didn’t happen then that couldn’t have happened. And the future is unknown so I can make it anything I want it to be. I let my life unfold a little at a time so that I don’t get over anxious and worried. It does no good to feel these ugly feelings when you could just choose to feel good all the time.

So when you choose to be happy and that sneaky doubt comes knocking on your door, just say, “No thank you!” and move on to the next happy thought. Just so you know I have written a whole workbook on how to get to this place in your life, it’s called, “Choose a Powerfully Positive Life”. You can find me on the Amazon Kindle. I hope this story has given you hope that life can be exactly what you want it to be, because it can!  So, until next time…

With all my Love, Deb Mertan

See my “Choose a Powerfully Positive Life” workbook

 

Let Go of the Residue

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My life has been pretty good lately. I have really resonated with the fact that this is an attraction based universe. I have proven it to myself over and over again in the past couple of years. So when I started noticing money missing from my bank account it really freaked me out. How could this be happening? I have been working on my happiness and getting a lot of good results. Things seemed to be moving in a very positive direction, so why was this happening, now? Well after 4 weeks of this I finally broke down and changed my account number and did all the necessary things to get everything back on track, like getting my direct deposits transferred and my automatic bill paying going again. It was a little bit of a hassle but it was worth it. I also started on line banking; which I thought I never would. During all the turmoil I couldn’t get a grasp on why this was happening but now that it was taken care of I looked back at what I may have done to bring this on to myself. I had to be thinking of something that would be making this come to me. Like I said, this is an attraction based universe so whatever you focus on, good or bad, will come to you. Then I realized that while I was daydreaming about the day my millions of dollars would arrive, not how or when or who would bring it, just fantasizing about what I would buy and the trips I would take and so on, but in the back of my mind there was this soft whisper saying, but how do I keep track of all that money? It wasn’t a deep thought, it was casual, just a sparse passing thought. But those are the ones that sneak up on you. It could be a good passing thought or a bad passing thought, but none the less it is sneaky.

For example, one day I was cleaning out my garage. I had loaned out one of my favorite CD’s to a friend and I thought to myself that I should buy a second one so that while that one was out I could still have one to listen to. As soon as the thought left my mind I opened a bag and voila there was a brand new set of the exact one I had loaned out. It was my son’s but he didn’t have a CD player so he left it in a bag that somehow ended up in the garage.

Now that may seem like a coincidence but these things just keep happening. Another time, I had just gotten my washing machine fixed and I made the statement that the next thing I was going to get was a refrigerator. Mine was not staying cold and the freezer was thawing and re-freezing everything so that it was all frost bitten. Again, I didn’t say how I was going to get one or if it would be new or used, I just casually said, in a matter of fact attitude that my next thing would be a refrigerator. Two days later my roommate said that his parents had sold their rental home that was very close to me and there was a refrigerator there if we wanted it. He asked me if I did want it and without hesitation I said yes, anything was better than mine. So I went to work not really thinking about what it would be like, in fact I even forgot that it was coming. When I got home I went to the coffee machine to get a cup and when I turned to get the creamer I was surprised and delighted to see a side-by-side huge white refrigerator standing there. What was really funny is that it was exactly the kind of frig that I had been wanting. And it was nice and cold inside. I literally screamed and jumped for joy.

So, getting back to my story about the bank, I thought that after figuring out what had caused this, my casual thought about managing money, that everything was fine and dandy once again. But gradually I started feeling pain in my right shoulder. It wasn’t too bad at first but it just kept nagging at me. It was hard to sleep and it eventually started affecting my left shoulder. I was going for massages trying to sooth it and my therapist said it was affecting my whole shoulder girdle. I tried topical pain creams and ibuprofen, sitting in the spa but nothing seemed to help. So one day while listening to one of my CD’s on law of attraction there was a story of a woman with pain from arthritis in her hips. She couldn’t understand how she could think positive thoughts when she hurt so badly. It was suggested to her that she could be in pain and feel fearful or be hopeful. It is all about vibration. She was asked, how does it make you feel? The woman answered that she felt restricted and weak. Right then I realized that I was feeling that too. This whole business of being violated made me feel that way and even though it was taken care of I had not let go completely of the fear. It was residual residue that I had been hanging on to. Now you may not believe this but as soon as I realized what was going on the pain almost completely disappeared. I was astonished. It was literally instantaneous. It has been three days now and I have not used any pain relievers, no heating pad or any other type of relief and I feel great. I can sleep and work and even though I still feel a tinge of the pain that was there occasionally it is nothing I can’t handle. Each passing day gets better and I have no doubt that it will continue to do so. The pain was just residual pain that I had not eliminated yet.

That actually reminded me of my mother and how she would be so calm in a crisis, but after everything would subside she would break down and cry. Now I know how that can build up and if you don’t relieve it, it will show up in other ways like pain. So next time you have a back ache or any other kind of pain think about what you have been thinking about and see how fast you feel better. Then you will also know not to think that thought any more. I know this sounds simple, but that is it. The work is to think better thoughts until they become habit or new beliefs. Do this until you get so good at it that bad thoughts will just feel wrong and you will want to go back to good thoughts. You will become addicted to feeling good and you will never be able to go the other way for very long again. The momentum of the joy you create for yourself will surely turn your life around and things will just keep getting better.

As I am seeing, by life experiences, that we definitely do live in an attraction based universe, my choices keep getting more and more deliberate. As per request so to speak. Science has proven that humans use a very small portion of their brains or minds if you will. I think the key is to make your request to the universe or whomever you consider to be the source from which all good comes, then sit back and relax and let the universe do its thing to bring it to you. When you finally realize that life is supposed to be easy, you will feel like a magician, conquering up a world that pleases you immensely and exclusively. You know it’s not the destination that is so delicious, it’s the journey. If you really pay attention to the signs that are being revealed to you constantly, you will start to have wonderful adventures all along your path. And if you really think about it, once you do accomplish whatever it is you are after, it becomes old news and a new idea catches your eye and there you go off to the next adventure. Life is so fun when you let it be. You are the only one blocking anything from coming to you, weather it is a lover or a big pile of money or anything else you are wanting. Relax, stop trying so hard to make things happen. Realize that once you ask for something you want there is a buffer of time before it will materialize. You don’t plant a seed and expect it to grow right away. So let the universe do it’s job and just enjoy the process. And notice the unfolding as you move into the direction of what you want. It’s not about being patient either. It’s about giving it time to grow. You don’t get pregnant and expect the baby to come now. You know it has to develop over a nine month period. So let your desires grow too. And have fun while waiting for the delivery. And stop doubting too. When you ask for something then question how it’s going to come and when it’s going to come and who is going to bring it, you add resistance to your desire and that slows everything way down and sometimes even stops the flow. So just ask and trust and go do something fun while you are waiting for whatever it is you are wanting. Expect it will come just like you know Christmas will come.

Here, let me show you an example of how to really get started. Think of yourself at the ocean. You want to go in the water but it’s very cold, so you tippy toe in maybe up to your ankles, but then you back up a little so it’s not so cold. Then you go back in and this time you go a little further, maybe to your shins, but it’s still too cold. You keep this up until you are fully in the water and you have acclimated to the temperature. That’s how learning how to change old habits or beliefs is. You do it a little at a time until it becomes normal to you. That’s how you stop doubting and start believing and eventually start knowing. Life will teach you through experience so pay attention to how you speak, think and feel. You will be amazed at how wonderful and delicious your life can and will be. Go big and do great things. That’s an order, so go. And remember there is great love here for you.

 

Forever your friend,

Deb Mertan

You too can live a life of attraction form the Universe with my guidebook 

 

You’re Always Here, You’re Never There

Happy people

I once had a boyfriend that always said, “I’m always here, I’m never there.” At the time I didn’t think too much about it. But today as I was driving to work the idea popped into my head that this statement was very profound. It is the truest statement I have ever heard. If you really give it some thought you can see that it makes a lot of sense to those of us who are always striving to live in the now. If I am always here then I must be living in the now. Just like there is no tomorrow, because when tomorrow gets here it is actually today. Oh yes, you can think about tomorrow or the future but you are doing it now. And you can travel to there, but once you get there you are actually here once again. When you pay attention to where you are it is a much happier way to live. You don’t need to justify how you got here, only know that everything that has occurred in your life has brought you to this point in time and it is exactly where you are supposed to be. And you don’t want to think too far into the future because the what-ifs start popping up and you can get cross-ways of what you are wanting.

Life is supposed to be fun. Sure, there are things that we do that most people would consider not fun but if you really look for it there is an element of fun in everything we do. Half of the fun is looking for it and finding it. People spend too much time fretting over things they have no control over and this is what gets them all balled up. The only thing we have total control over, if we choose to practice it, is our emotions. Think about the animals of our world. They do not fret, not one little bit, especially our domestic pets. They are not worried about getting up on time for work or what they are going to wear today. They don’t ask anyone what’s for dinner, they just wait until the bowl is full and then they eat what’s there. They have no doubt that they will be taken care of. We need to feel more like that in order to free up our minds to think about more fun stuff to do.

Or think about it this way. What if you were a new born baby? You don’t worry that you will starve. You give a little cry out to mom or dad and they come with a bottle. And when your diaper is dirty they change you. And besides sleeping, those are the only things that you need. Life is simple and good. If you really stretch your imagination you can see that this is how the universe works. When you start believing that everything is always taken care of for you, you can relax and enjoy yourself. Use your emotions as your guide. The happier you are the more things will go your way. Once you practice this for a while you will never want to go back to fretting. You will realize what a waste of time it is and how bad it is on your wellbeing. You must realize that happiness is a choice and once you apply it to your everyday life you will feel better; not only emotionally but physically as well. I have said this before in many of my blogs that everything starts on the inside. That means that the only way to feel better is to fill yourself with happy thoughts and be as loving as possible. When you choose to share your love and joy you attract other like-minded people it becomes a constant loop of bliss. Why would anyone want anything less than that?

One thing that works well for me is to smile at myself in the mirror, and say, “I love you Deb.” When you love yourself fully you see it reflected back through the eyes and actions of others. It gets more and more exciting to me to see how loved I am through others. And it also reflects back from our domestic animals. They just seem to gravitate to me now in a way I have never known before. It makes me know that I am on my right track and I have nothing but great things in store for me. It is so easy for me to talk to people and play and have fun in everything I do. I look for the right person to sit next to on an airplane or at the lunch counter in a restaurant. When I purposely sit next to someone it always turns out to be a fun time. You may be thinking that you are too shy or embarrassed to talk to a stranger but believe me it is more fun than you think. You’re probably never going to see that person again so who cares if you act silly. In fact, being silly is what children do all the time and they don’t worry if someone is looking at them funny. Have you ever watched a young child at a doctor’s office playing and laughing, while all the adults are somber and serious? That’s because they know that there is nothing serious going on here. They are a great example of always being here. If I were you, I would stop worrying and fretting, and I would kick fear to the curb. Life is so good when you let it be. Give yourself permission to be free and take deep breaths when you feel overwhelmed. Line up with your inner being and see how great things, really are. Treat yourself the way you want to be treated and you will see that others treat you that way too.

I love my life so much that I can’t help but share what I have learned with all of you lovely people. And once you start filling yourself with this everlasting joy you will want to share it too. It becomes addicting and then contagious. But it is better than any drug that is out there. It is a high that will become a euphoric familiarity that you will want to cherish forever. Remember there is nothing serious going on here and you can’t get it wrong and you’ll never get it done. New thoughts and ideas will constantly be coming to you and life will continue to get better and better.

So what are we talking about here? We are talking about being present in the here and now and staying as happy as possible. Making better choices and looking for the fun in life. How much easier could it be? Be happy, be happy, be happy! And then be happy some more! Okay so now you got it. So go do it. Practice fun, joy and love. Life will change in what seems to be in miraculous ways, but in reality that is the way it is supposed to be. And one more thing, remember there is always great love here for you.

 

Forever, Your Friend,

Deb Mertan

 

 

 

Look for the Silver Lining

silver lining

 

 

Have you ever had things go terribly wrong only to find out later that whatever it was that happened turned out to be a blessing in disguise? That is because we are always receiving what we focus on the most. Whether we want it or not, if we give it our full attention it will surely show up. You see, we live in an attraction based universe, so when you say yes about something, and you let it gestate long enough, without adding any doubt into the mix, you will see it. But if you say no to something you don’t want, you will also attract that, because you give your attention to it. The universe doesn’t hear what you say, it responds to how you feel. Example, when a parent is yelling at a child, saying in a loud voice, “Don’t you know I love you!” it sends a mixed message to the child. The words don’t match the feeling behind them. Or if you were to tell someone that you are sorry for something you did or didn’t do, and you sounded snotty while saying it, that would also not match. Those are two examples of feeling verses words but it also applies to how you feel when you say you want something. Like let’s say you wanted a new car and you casually said, “I’m thinking about getting a new car.” You don’t really hear any resistance in that statement. You could just go about your business and not give it too much thought and before you know it you would be getting a new car. But if you were to say after that statement, “But I don’t see how I could do that” that would throw up a wall that would stop all momentum from moving forward. When you feel light and confident about it things move along at just the right pace. Things come to you when you are ready to receive them. But when you are all balled up asking, where is it, when is it going to get here, you slow everything way down.

Have you ever heard the phrase, ask and it is given? Well that is the truest statement ever uttered out of anyone’s mouth. Sometimes you may think that what you asked for isn’t coming, so you keep asking for the same thing over and over again. Being redundant doesn’t help anything. The universe knows what you want and knows how to get it to you. Just relax and be casual about it. Life is supposed to be fun and if you remember that every day you will start to see a tipping of the scale, from the not wanted to the wanted. But in order to stop thinking about the unwanted you have to start thinking about something else. You can’t just stop thinking about that thing you’re not going to think about. That just keeps perpetuating the thought. You have to look for things to think about or focus on that are pleasing to you, things that make you smile. Of course this all takes practice. Everything that is worth doing does take practice. Everything that you do now took training, and I mean everything, from dressing yourself to driving a car. So why is this any different? A belief is just a thought you keep thinking so why not change the direction of your thoughts. The only reason it may seem difficult at first to think better thoughts is because you have been trained either by others or by your own habits of thoughts to think that way and you have a momentum going in that direction. But if you think of your emotions or in other words your feelings, as your navigational guide you will always know which way you are going. It’s like your GPS system guiding you turn by turn and when you stray it says, “Please return to the highlighted route.” That is what gut instinct is all about. When you practice this and get pretty good at it you will become super sensitive to how you are feeling and be able to return to the route very quickly, before you get any momentum going in the wrong direction. This is all very simple stuff but it can seem hard at first like I mentioned earlier. And just because it seems too simple to have any effect on your mood or attitude, don’t be fooled. It will have a great impact on your life in a very positive way. It can be as soon as tomorrow or it could take 30 days, it’s all up to you and how earnest you are in focusing on what it is you want in your life.

Have you ever seen a 3-D printer at work? They are so awesome, and a little weird if you ask me. I have a friend that has one and I watched it make a cover for a remote control device that’s goes to his drone camera. As I was seeing this thing form right before my very eyes I started thinking about things working out for me in a similar way. It’s like I put my request out to the universe and then I just kick back and let it do it’s thing. I don’t have to keep checking to see if it’s on track because I know it will work on it until all of a sudden there it is. Actually it’s also like planting a seed. You don’t plant corn and then get a rose bush. You know that when you plant the corn seed you will eventually get corn, but only after it takes root and grows into a full blown corn stalk. My suggestion is to know what you want and tell the story the way you want it to be. I know Donald Trump is an odd duck but he has the right idea about how to go about getting what he wants. When he is building a new building, like a casino, he talks about how great it’s going to be and how everyone is going to love going there, and so on. He tells the story he wants to be true. You know you can do that with everything in your life, even the stuff you consider really bad. If you just look at things from your past with a new perspective and find the silver lining, you will feel a whole lot better and things in your now will be able to move forward. And if you don’t get yourself too far into the future with what-if thoughts you will also feel a whole lot better and things will move even faster to get you to where you what to be, or should I say where you want to feel, and that just comes down to staying in a good mood and mostly being happy. You can choose to be happy right now if you really want to. You are so free to choose what you want or you could choose bondage. But why would you choose something that goes against your nature to feel good? I’ll tell you why, because you just got used to it, but now it’s time for a change! It’s time to think on purpose and create your own journey, the way you want it to be. Be your own boss and love with all your heart. Be un-conditional and love even the haters. You don’t have to like or dislike anything anyone else does or doesn’t do but love is a powerful tool that can spread to even the worst people on earth. If more people did more things out of love the world would have to change to a greater place to live. We all have a say in our own lives and our own world.

I guess I’ve rambled on long enough. If you’re going to get it, I’m sure you have by now. Just one last thing before I go, be careful what you wish for because you will get it, whether it’s wanted or un-wanted. Be nice to yourself and love deeply. Sooner than you think things are going to change and the better it gets, the better it gets. There is great love here for you.

You too may get started on a journey of bliss, joy and finding your destiny with my guidebook.

Forever, Your Friend

Deb Mertan